We have all heard it. If I were you, I would…

Is such a statement meant to motivate, or is it instead a strategy by which we assert our position in life? Is it motivation at all?

What is our positionality? Positionality is the idea that one’s personal values, views, and location in time and space influence how one understands the world.

In the context of motivation in an organizational setting, one way to think about ‘the other’ is to simultaneously recognize and balance the idea that he, she, them possess as much reality and/or validity as you. ‘They’ are you insofar as they are nothing other than themselves, which is an ontological idea with a specific, although loose, claim on the nature of existence.

What is ontology?  One of the longest standing ontological questions in philosophy concerns the existence, or not, of God or some sense of a higher being.

This seems abstract except when we frame this concept within our social, shared reality. Does reality exist independently from an observer, or is it something to be negotiated with others?

How we answer the above question is important, because it will inform how we think we should motivate those around us. If we believe there is an objective reality, we may not feel we need to understand another’ s positionality in order to advise them. If, on the other hand, we believe reality is a construct, one created with others, our belief in our ability to motivate others will be shaped by whether we think we understand their position in life.

The extent to which we feel the need to understand others is a reflection of a worldview, one that informs behaviors. Our worldview is often hidden from us. We often react, act, make statements, and conduct our affairs as if there is a bottom line that supports our rationale.

When we seek to motivate others in the workplace, it may behoove us to consider what it is we think we know and feel before we lay claim to what is needed to perform in a particular role.

“If I were you” could be reframed into something like, “I’m not you, but here is what has worked for me. Would you like to hear my view?”

There is a direct correlation between the effort we can make to consider the thoughts and feelings of others and what we receive in return. Is that statement a fact, or just the opinion of the writer? Does the writer believe what he/she/them writes?

What is their motivation? What is yours?

About Spaciology

Spaciology is not abstract theory; rather, it is a practice you can feel.

  • Inside: Pause, breathe, notice.
  • Outside: Design rooms, rituals, and agendas that slow the spin and invite care.
  • Between us: Make dialogue a place where different truths can live together long enough to teach something.

Ultimately, leadership is the art of making space for what’s important (for everyone) and letting that clarity shape the next step. When we change the spaces from which we lead, our strategies change with them.

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Robert Levey